Maximize Your Optimization!
Dear Spam Author,
First of all, let me say how flattered I am by the many kind comments you have written on my website. I’m so pleased that you advise all your “facebook buddies” to read my site!
Also, I cannot thank you enough for your generous offers of assistance. Although I was a little confused by your willingness to help me with maximizing my Search Engine Optimization. Wouldn’t that be the same thing as optimizing my optimization?
What’s more, thanks to you I now understand that I can use my website to generate a very comfortable income. It seems only reasonable that I should provide you with a nominal fee, which would be just a tiny slice of the massive wealth I will soon be accumulating.
And I in turn would be more than willing to help others in the same way. What a cycle of wealth creation we will unleash together! I think this is what economists call the multiplier effect.
However, I have noticed that your wonderfully informative spam emails – which I encourage all my friends to read – lack certain elements that would contribute to greater SIO (Spam Impact Optimization).
Please allow me to help you send spam that really lives up to its full potential! Your excellent spam really deserves nothing less. Plus, the cost is hardly worth mentioning.
In closing, let me say it’s so nice of you to offer those genuine Hermes scarves and prescription medicines at laughably low prices. Unfortunately, scarves are just not my look, and my neighborhood Walgreen’s is so convenient. But thanks for keeping me in mind!
Hearing from you so often really makes my day! I’m sorry I can’t reciprocate just as frequently. Even so, I already feel like we have become really good friends.
Until next time, my best wishes!